Have you ever had a moment in life when you questioned everything you did, and you wondered if you made the right decision? That is how I feel. I have so many thoughts that go through my head everyday on this subject. Do you make decisions with your head or with your heart, or both? If you pray and feel God's leading in something, and you follow that leading, can you ever feel as if you made the biggest mistake of your life? And how do you fix that, or do you? Too many thoughts... I am an emotional person, more so since I have had my children. Something about childbirth and babies has made me much more of a cryer, someone that I never was pre-baby. In fact I used to think that is was silly to cry about anything. Not now, oh, no. I am a constant fountain, well maybe not constant, but I am more emotional as a mother. This just adds to the questions in my mind. Not only do I question, but I FEEL things and that makes everything more difficult. I think that the only thing that will help me is time. Time to chew things over and hash them out and cry about it and figure out how I truly feel. But I am not sure if how I FEEL is a very good measure of whether something is good or not. So maybe that was the wrong way of wording things. Time will give me the opportunity to step back and look at the bigger picture and not have frustration and emotions of the moment interfere.
Oh well, this is all just ramblings, but I feel a slight bit better.
2 comments:
Hey Kate! I think it's normal to question things, especially when you've had major life changing things going on like adopting a kid, moving, training for a new job... !!! You've got a lot going on! And I think it makes us question even more when things don't happen how we thought they were going to... Hope it helped you to write things down!
Katie:
I completely agree! i use to get angry; now I cry.
I think you are very wise in giving your issue some time, prayer and seek wise counsel if available. It seems are lives go by so quickly;maybe thats why I'm always behind on things. My biggest fear in life is that my children will grow up and look back and tell me I was a bad mom. It will be completly okay if they are mad about specific events or decision,but I so desire-no I strive- for them to have good child hoods. Mostly even if/when bad stuff happens I need them to know I loved them, I tried my very best, and all of the times I failed God was right there to catch them.
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